getting ready to go to hawaii

Enjoying Love in a new space. Dreams and dreams. Deferred. Plans. Why can't letting go. Don't try. Be. Allow fire. Anger. Peace. Work thru Anger. Afraid of him. B/c afraid of being lonely. Of not having anyone. Waiting for others to join.

buy an instrument on Hawaii.

Let go of the internship.

Yo whats up

How is life going?
I don't know. I am enjoying myself. Love & Life to all beings.

Well I missed a few things

I am trying to go by feeling but that is unclear right now. I want to destroy. I want to blame him. I want to blame myself for my creation. Love & Light is supposed to be the only thing. i want to get rid of TV. And just play or enjoy life. Simple Complex, Mystery. Light & Love. Moving into the world. Enjoying life. Walking running hiking, biking, swimming. Focus, determination.

Set daily goals. That was cool to see. Love & Light. Peace & Joy. Happiness and beyond.

Thank You for the daily dose & Ritual.

Whats going on

I want to do this
I want to do that
I am afraid of who is coming
The sexual energy is frightening
I want to move on go do something fun

I don't care anymore

Sometimes I feel like life has no meaning. That I want attention. Who is out there. Why I am not connected. But seriouslly

why - why keep going with all this. Why not quit . Hard times

PTI Experience

The agreement - to go and enjoy. Jealousy is lousy teacher. Why do we evolve? Why do we want this life to be the way it is? Why not love each other with reckless regard. Deep regard. Friendss hurt cloeses admiration jealousy a teacher a leader and a shower of the way.

Dream Keepers

The Movie is excellent
Indian stories being told through another story. It is very very blessed. Loved one. Being of light and joy. Be one with us now.

We watched Dream Keepers last night. It was long and was the kind of movie that kept me wishing it would last longer and longer. One of those once in a life time movies.

The story is a good one, not to spoil it but you get a lot of pleasing stories out of it. It was really pretty cool. Lots of lessons.

Work has been an exercise in making mistakes

Lots of stuff went on this week. The optimist in me says its okay. The realist says this sux. Our build system is crap. Its hard to tell if you even will checkin something successfully. And I seem to be mastering the art of making the best decision possible. Love is hard. And Playful. It's been hard. Who would I say this too. Would I say yeah I am feeling sorry for myself. Talk to Saori and tell her what it's like. Muhammad WTT get the CNew working side integrate CNew and keep going :)

Sometimes I feel like quitting work

Like I don't belong there and that I am doing something useless and I am allowing it. It seems that I would be better off doing something favorable elsewhere. I don't know for sure. I also feel betrayed in a sense. Like Chris is becoming a problem. Like he cant deal with his emotions anymore. Like he needs emotional support and I am becoming his cushion. That is exactly what I don't want. Fuck him, but forward let him find his way. Go get help. We can help each other. Not to be a burden. Stand on your own two feet.

Morning Love

Morning Highs
Love into the Night
How we move through the world is how our souls guide us. Be with us as we move. Be of Us as we Groove. Be the Blessings in our Souls. Be the knight among our Arrows. Be the Solstice in our Souls. Be.

The Love Of Life is a key important ingredient

To how we behave. Without such a thing, we are doomed. We have all the love we need. Simply to expose it, drop in and taste it. And go from there. Like a wave of fire - ferocious like a lion. Cunning like a fox. Flowing like a snake. And Blessed like a Pelican/Goose.

Love & Light to All,
May All Prosper
May All Succeed
May All be Blessed

Hari Om

Peace & Loveliness

Being a healer is wonderful. Being attracted to love is wondering ful. Being Joyful is wonderful. Being excited is wondering ful. Filled with wonder is wonder ful. Being attractive and looking good is nice. Feeling appreciated and appreciating myself is wonderful.

Judgement is harsh and a learning experience. Something to learn from the others in our lives where our / my judgements are. Allow myself to be, like me and expansive into more. Limiting less. - Limit Less - Thank You Mani.

Happy New Year Everyone

I spent it pretty quietly and peacefully. In some ways it was the best New Year's I have ever had. In some ways it was a bit of a let down. I enjoyed playing and be at peace. I just wish we had done something on New Year's eve. We stayed in just like we did 10 years ago. Strange interesting odd. It was cool though. Patterns among patterns.

Thoughts and ideas.
Love & Blessings,
Carlos